Comma Momma

Writings of a Wife and Mother

Mobility Happens
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I used to blog when Jonathan was playing independently -- you know, that time when he'd stay on the play mat and occupy himself with heaps of toys.

Then crawling and his obsession with all things computer began.  Jonathan loves to crawl all over and cruise around the laptop cart, pull power cords, and chew on the mouse.  He'll even bang his fists on the keyboard if I sit him in my lap.

So, needless to say, I only have computer time when Jonathan is asleep.  And my priorities during naptime are always my own nap, making some effort at cleaning, and wasting time on Facebook.

But maybe things will change.  We finally setup the Joovy Room^2, so I'm now able to pee in peace and begin dinner at a reasonable hour.  Jonathan can poke his head over the side, and I don't feel like it's a prison so much anymore.  Maybe I can get over my guilt at putting him in there long enough to make a post every...well, monthly would be an improvement, huh?


Two Vacations and No Funerals
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Planned vacations are great; unplanned ones aren't.

The radiant barrier installation went horribly wrong.  Although the radiant barrier is okay, the technician disconnected the air conditioner's float pan switch while stumbling around in the attic.  Of course, Joe and I know absolutely nothing about A/C repair, so we had to call out a professional.  Who couldn't come out until the next afternoon.  Even though we had no cooling.  During a heat advisory.  AAGGHH!

So Joe, Jonathan, and I spent the night at a hotel.  It was interesting to watch Jonathan trying to figure out what was happening -- and then see him scoot around to investigate each inch of the room.  Fortunately, our air conditioning was an easy fix, and we only had to be away from home one night.

We spent last weekend -- planned -- visiting my parents back in Louisiana.  Joe made a presentation to their church about his mission trip, and we attended my 10-year high school reunion.

I'm not sure what to think about the reunion.  I attended three schools between my eighth grade and senior years, so I never really felt connected to my alma mater.  I spent most of those years bitter about the situation and only really adapting to each school just before I was forced to leave.  Maybe I would have had more friends and nostalgic experiences had I spent all four years in once place. 

But I went to the reunion anyway, reprising my role as audio-visual geek by replaying the senior memories slideshow I made ten years ago.  (I had to convert it from VHS -- how backward we were in 1999!)   And I felt I should go even if the only benefit was letting people see I turned out fairly normal after all.  The shy, mousy, dateless, brainiac Jessica actually got married and had a kid!

Goodbye, STARband!
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Jonathan is now a STARband graduate!

We saw Jonathan's orthotist today, and Jonathan's cranial asymmetry was measured at 6mm, which is considerably improved from his original 16mm difference.  Therefore, the orthotist said Jonathan was ready to graduate -- Joe and I are so thrilled! 

We know Jonathan could improve further, but we're just so tired of dealing with the helmet.  The orthotist said he usually graduates kids between 6 - 8mm, but the plagiocephaly message boards I follow has some parents who aren't happy unless they reach perfection.  Seriously -- there was a lady complaining about her baby's 0.5mm asymmetry!

Because I was somewhat on the fence, the orthotist recommended Jonathan wear the helmet while sleeping to capture any additional growth.  Apparently, studies show babies grow more at night than during the day.  We'll continue with this recommendation for the next 2 - 3 weeks.  The orthotist estimates Jonathan will outgrow the helmet within this time period.

It's so wonderful caressing Jonathan's round head.  I've missed being able to give him kisses on the forehead.  And now I'm eager and excited to do the things we've had to avoid for the past 13 weeks.  We're getting a kiddie pool to finally let him splash around in the sun, and we're going to hang his bucket swing on the backyard swing set.  It will be great to not worry about sweating -- and to actually play outside.


Extreme Attic Makeover
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Since we moved into the house in March 2007, Joe and I have always had a running mental list of improvements we'd like to make.

The first was replacing the fence, which Hurricane Ike facilitated last year.  Improvements in energy efficiency were a close second.  So today we make a big improvement -- we're getting a radiant barrier!

Radiant barrier is a metallic coating sprayed inside an attic that reflects the sun's radiant heat and prevents much of it from entering the home.  It's often combined with extra attic insulation.  We're getting both done this morning by Efficient Attic Systems.

It's touted to save homeowners 30 percent on energy bills.  It would be great to see that sort of savings -- especially since our most recent electricity bill was over $300.  In the heat of the day, our A/C blows continuously and can never cool below 78 degrees until the sun goes down.

Next on the list?  Either double-paned windows or a kitchen remodel.  (Yep, it'll be awhile.)
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My Blog's Been Out for Summer
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Summer has been three letters:  H-O-T.  Perhaps it hasn't been any worse than a usual summer in Houston, but I'm sure feeling it more this year.  I've always been confined to an office during the heat of the day, but now I find myself running errands while sweat runs all over me.

The heat hasn't been easy for Jonathan either.  He's been in the STARband cranial remolding orthosis for twelve weeks and has had wonderful results.  He progressed from 16mm to 11mm of asymmetry in the first six weeks and then dropped to 5mm in the following four weeks.  His head will be rescanned on August 5, and if remaining under 5mm, he can graduate and begin the "weaning off" process.  I'm thrilled!  We've promised Jonathan a kiddie pool to celebrate since he hasn't gotten to enjoy a swim with the 23-hour wearing schedule.

We've seen my in-laws once this summer; it was the first time since Easter.  Awkward -- but Jonathan seemed to make them happy.  We also had a really nice visit with Joe's sister and brother-in-law in San Antonio over July 4th weekend.

And more travel is in the works -- Joe, Jonathan, and I are headed to Louisiana in August for my ten-year high school reunion.  When did I get so old?  Joe is also making a presentation to my parents' church about his mission trip to Costa Rica with Happy Feet International.  I'm doing multimedia for both the reunion and Joe's mission photos.

Otherwise, I'm chasing an increasingly active 7.5 month old who's figured out how to sit up on his own and propel himself across the floor on his tummy.  (It's uber cute.)

June?
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Um, wow.  Where did June go?

Pain in the Plantar
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So it's plantar fasciitis -- a painful inflamation of the muscle that supports the arch of the foot.

I'm actually impressed.  I was joking about leaving the podiatrist's office with a new set of feet -- but I really do feel better.  How often can you say that about a doctors appointment?  Usually you have to take two of whatever they've scratched on the RX pad and wait 2 - 3 days.

First, the doctor felt my heels and found the sore spots.  He then whipped out an ultrasound machine and lubed up my heel.  He showed me the inflamation on the screen, but I'm honestly not sure what I was seeing.  I am confident it wasn't a baby, though.

My treatment?  A cortizone shot.  I'm okay with needles as long as I don't see their approach -- surely nothing is as bad as an epidural, right?  Almost.  The podiatrist used the ultrasound to know where to aim the need, and he got the right area.  Oh boy, did he get the right area.  It was almost -- ALMOST -- as painful as the six epidural attempts I suffered during labor.

But as soon as he taped me up and I put on my socks and shoes, I felt better than I have in months.

I go back next week for another cortizone shot.  And maybe another in two weeks.  Then we look at getting me arch supports -- something better than foam inserts.

Too Many Doctors, Too Little Time
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Sometimes I think my new job isn't motherhood -- instead, I've become a professional scheduler and keeper of doctors appointments.

In the past two months, the appointment schedule has been crazy:

April 13 - Pediatrician (Jonathan)
April 22 - Orthotist (Jonathan)
May 7 - Orthotist (Jonathan)
May 14 - Orthotist (Jonathan)
May 19 - Neurosurgeon (Jonathan)
May 27 - Orthotist (Jonathan)
Today - Podiatrist (Me)

Yep, I'm finally getting to a foot doctor.  I haven't been able to walk without pain in my right heel for almost six weeks.  The dull ache never goes away, but it's worst with my first steps in the morning and after I'm totally exhausted at night.  Each day I'd rationalize it wasn't so bad (after I'd gotten over the initial pain), but I'd be in tears by night swearing to Joe I couldn't go another day without relief.  I'm hoping they'll have another pair of size 11 female feet in the back so I can just trade mine in.  I don't have time for a lengthy treatment or recovery.

June isn't looking much better for our schedule, though.  Jonathan continues to see his orthotist every two weeks.  I've also got to get him in for his six month checkup and immunizations.  And I really must see my psychiatrist and OB/GYN for new prescriptions; I doubt they'll keep authorizing the pharmacy's refill requests without my coming in for appointments.  No one wants to be around me without my happy pills -- including myself.  And I don't think it's time to make us a family of four just yet.

I'm not one of those nuts with Muchausens syndrome.   I just want to be a normal mom who can walk and take care of her little boy who has a symmetrical head.

What a Phat Mat is That
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Even though he's been rolling over for a few weeks, Jonathan has really advanced in speed and agility.  I turn my back and he's barrel-rolled four or five feet!  He's so quick that our area rug or an afghan can't protect him from the den's hardwood floor anymore.

So Joe and I bought a foam mat from Sams Club this weekend.  It's 4' x 8' and comes in sections like a puzzle for easy assembly and customization.  In just three days, it's been one of our best baby purchases ever.  Jonathan rolls with wild abandon and it's great on mine and Joe's knees when playing on the floor with him.

I must really love this little guy.  Years ago, I promised I'd never be one of those parents who allow baby gear to take over their house.  Never say never -- I've become one of those parents!

(Oh, and anytime Jonathan isn't on the mat, a cat -- or two -- occupies it.)

Sweet Tweet
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In an effort to keep up with social media trends, I have finally joined Twitter.  Does that make me a tweeter, a twitterer, or just a twit?

You can follow me here.

The Mom Routine
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Wake up.  Be a mom.  Wash, rinse, repeat.

The only item of note these past few weeks has been Jonathan getting his STARband.  He's done surprisingly well.  Once in the helmet, he's slept through the night and also learned to roll from tummy to back.  He developed a blister on his forehead last Thursday, so he took a five-day break to allow the skin to heal.  He's back in doing the Day 2 schedule of two hours in, one hour out.  We get some looks and the occasional point, but otherwise, no rude comments.  The people who matter are very supportive.

I need to take better care of me.  I've put off doctors appointments for myself, and I'm pressing my luck with having Walgreens call physicians for refill authorizations.  I also need a haircut.  The last time I had a cut and color was Halloween.  The amount of gray coming through looks very October 31. 

Sleepless in My Synapses
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I can't sleep.  It's complicated, and I'm not even sure how much I want to explain.

I just feel so out of control when it comes to finances now.  It's different being a stay-at-home mom and not contributing financially.  I'm totally confident Joe can provide for us, but when things come up and are discussed near bedtime, my worries won't let me sleep.  Then I cry and it's my runny nose that won't let me sleep.

We're having trouble getting out of a contract for Joe's martial arts classes.  And Jonathan is getting the helmet for his plagiocephaly this month.  So I toss and turn in bed and blame myself for all these things and their financial implications. 

If only I was a better mother and didn't need Joe's help with Jonathan in the evenings so he could continue his classes... 

If only I'd done something / anything / everything different in the pregnancy and prevented the torticollis and plagiocephaly...

But don't I deserve a break in the evenings?  Do I have to do everything 24x7?  And really, no one can prevent congenital torticollis.

Yet I still beat myself up about it all. 

Maybe I'll still be awake when Jonathan wakes for his 4am feeding.
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Five Years Ago
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Five years ago today, Joe and I had our first date.  We met at a pool hall, he beat me mercilessly, and we had Tex-Mex for dinner.

I wasn't even sure if I wanted to go out with him again -- but look what happened.  He's my husband, and we have a son.

I wouldn't change a thing.

Crippled, Wannabe Extremist
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I'd planned to be one of those "right-wing extremists" and attend the downtown Houston tea party today -- but it doesn't look like I'll make it.  I'm so bummed.  I'd had a great sign planned for Jonathan too...oh well.

The reason I'm having to back out?  I stumped my toe Sunday night on the sofa.  I can usually bounce back from such a klutzy move within a few minutes, but I really did a number on it this time.  It swelled overnight and I could barely walk Monday morning.  Three days later my toe still looks like a purple, blue, and yellow Easter egg, and I continue to limp around the house.  Just running errands at the church yesterday took all my energy.  I just don't think I'll be able to hobble around Jones Plaza.

And I woke up this morning with a scratchy, sore throat and itchy inner ears.  Maybe allergies? Hopefully it's nothing catching.

So, I'll be downtown in spirit -- and at the Alamo via the Glenn Beck show.
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Reminiscing to the Oldies
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I was driving home sans Jonathan last night -- which means instead of toddler CDs, I was able to flip through my FM presets.  I stumbled across Seal's "Kiss from a Rose" on what I suppose is considered an oldies station now.  *sigh*

My thoughts immediately went back to the summer of 1995; it was just before I began my freshman year of high school.  I remember "prepping" my walkman for the family's road trip to California.  Back then, saving your favorite music was loading a cassette into your tape player and pressing the record button when a cool song came on the radio -- not downloading from iTunes to your iPod,.  I remember recording "Kiss from a Rose" along with Dave Matthews Band's "What Would You Say", "Waterfalls" by TLC, and Bryan Adams' "Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman?"  It was a good, reliable soundtrack for my three days through the desert with my parents.

Gosh, that was 14 years ago.  Half my life ago.

I felt old until the next song came on -- Corey Hart's "Sunglasses at Night".  Yep, it's easier to feel young when the oldies station finally plays something from your potty training days.

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While I'm reminiscing...  Last night was the one-year anniversary of our positive pregnancy test.  It's so weird thinking a year ago, my 16+ pound Jonathan was a newly-implanted 0.2 mm embryo.

Life is such a miracle.

My Future TV Addict
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It started with Wheel of Fortune and then expanded to The Price Is Right.  Now my baby has turned himself around in the exersaucer and is cooing at a lawn fertilizer commercial.

Yep, I'm turning the TV off now before anything worse comes on the morning news.
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The Great 28
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I turned 28 yesterday -- which means I can no longer claim to be in my "mid-twenties".

Joe asked last night where this birthday ranked in relation to all my other birthdays -- which is a trick question, of course.  Joe proposed to me on my birthday in 2005, and we moved into our house on my birthday in 2007.  So, I guess this year was my third best birthday ever.  It would be hard to top those other two.

I was blessed with many well wishes from friends and family, and a sweet little boy spent the whole day with me. Joe made the day special with a surprise cake from my favorite local bakery too!

But most of all, I learned this year to treat myself.  Jonathan and I browsed the childrens' exhibits at the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo with our MOPS group.  Sure, we did kiddie stuff but -- SHHH... -- I did it for me more than Jonathan.  I had a blast showing him the baby calves, chicks, and pigs while he drifted in and out of his naps.  He'll never remember it, but it made my day.

It was a good birthday.

Torticollis Progress
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Jonathan is currently transfixed by his fingers and a stuffed froggie -- finally allowing me time to update on his progress.

I took Jonathan to his first physical therapy appointment last Friday.  The therapist showed me three simple exercises to stretch his neck muscles.  Jonathan didn't seem to mind the stretches at the appointment, but he's learned to express his disapproval -- VERY LOUDLY -- here at home.  It pains me and Joe to force him into the stretches, but it's best for him.

We must be doing a decent job, because the therapist thought Jonathan was doing amazingly better when we met with her today.  She advised us to continue the stretches at home; otherwise, return if we had any problems or if Jonathan's pediatrician is still concerned at his 4-month checkup.

Even if his torticollis is improving, the plagiocephaly is still a problem.  I feel like his head shape has worsened over the weekend.  Joe -- always hopeful and optimistic -- even agreed the right side looked flatter over the past few days.  I'm finally coming to terms with Jonathan needing a helmet, and I've been fortunate to meet two moms with recent helmet grads.  It's not as scary as it seemed at first.  I almost welcome the helmet, because I'm now convinced it will be the only way for our little boy's head to be normal.


Who Takes Care of Mommy?
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I'm in a funk and not doing a good job of taking care of myself. 

I let my depression meds run out without realizing one needed a new prescription from my doctor.  The status of the refill at walgreens.com says a pharmacist will contact the doctor -- I really hope that's true.  I don't see how I can drag myself to her office anytime soon.

I also didn't get a shower yesterday.  That's a really bad sign.  Anyone who knows me well knows I detest the way my hair feels if it isn't washed in any 24-hour period.

The dreary, rainy weather is also contributing to this foul mood, I'm sure.  Other culprits are a crappy phone call Joe had with his parents concerning Jonathan's condition and just Jonathan's condition in general.  I continue reading about torticollis and plagiocephaly online, and I become so anxious to begin treatment and get these issues behind us.

It's a different experience being depressed and a mother.  Before Jonathan, I would have slept away the day in bed.  As a depressed mother, I find some reserve of energy to keep Jonathan fed, diapered, and for us to have some playtime.

If only I could bottle Jonathan's smiles into some kind of capsule.

My Poor, Deformed Baby
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The past week has been a whirlwind of activity -- specifically, Jonathan has had many doctors' appointments and exams.  He's been diagnosed with congenital muscular torticollis (CMT) and plagiocephaly.

Joe and I noticed some ear misalignment and odd head shape for Jonathan as early as six weeks.  I mentioned our concerns to the pediatrician we saw -- not his normal doc -- at his first round of immunizations.  She suggested I place Jonathan to sleep on his side and said the symptoms we saw did not seem serious.  Over the past month, Jonathan's condition has only worsened.  We noticied he resists moving his head to the left and his forehead has begun to protrude on his right side.  I made an appointment with his regular pedi to ask her opinion -- and I'm so, so glad I didn't wait until his next appointment.

Jonathan does not have a full range of motion for his neck due to torticollis.  The condition occurs when the muscle that runs up and toward the back of baby's neck (sternocleidomastoid muscle) is shortened.  It causes the head to tilt and baby to be unable to fully move his head toward the affected side.

Because of the torticollis and his limited range of motion, Jonathan has also developed plagiocephaly -- an abnormal head shape with flattening of the skull.  Jonathan's plagiocephaly is positional since he favors his right side when sleeping, playing on the floor, and sitting in the car seat and swing.

So we begin physical therapy Friday for the torticollis.  With increased range of motion, Jonathan should be able to overcome favoring his right side -- hopefully in time to make a difference in his head shape.  If he doesn't show good progress in the next four weeks, though...well, he'll need a helmet.  Oh, my heart aches just thinking about Jonathan needing a helmet, but I'm beginning to accept the worst case scenerio.  We met with a clinician for Cranial Technologies' DOC band yesterday and had some preliminary measurements taken.  Jonathan's cranial vault asymmetry is 16mm -- considered fairly severe.  It's unlikely therapy alone will correct it.  The clinician also noticed some facial asymmetry that Joe and I hadn't.  Jonathan's right cheek, jaw, and eye are moving forward of his left, which could lead to vision issues and chewing issues if left untreated.

In explaining the details, I feel so matter of fact -- at least now.  I'm over the initial emotional response.  Of course, no one wants something to be wrong with their child.  And in some ways, I feel guilty.  Did I do something that caused or worsened the torticollis and plagiocephaly?  Is it related to the medications I continued during the pregnancy or the excess amniotic fluid we battled in the second and third trimesters?  Did I not rotate Jonathan enough in his crib or in feeding positions?  Am I a bad mom for not wanting my son to be as cute as possible?  Am I vain for worrying about the stares and questions if Jonathan gets a helmet?

Yep, these are the questions that keep spinning through my head.

We have an appointment with another provider of cranial othoses on Thursday.  For now, I'm researching and learning as much as possible to help Jonathan.